Location: Post Office CounterCharacters: Female Customer (limping and carrying a parcel and a shoe). Behind the counter, a Young Chit of a Girl, with dyed black hair and nose-stud.
Woman (PLACING BROWN PAPER PARCEL ON SCALES): I'd like to send this first class, please.
Chit (POINTING AT PARCEL): What's that say?
Woman: Near Keighley, West Yorkshire.
Chit: Airmail, then?
Woman: Airmail?
Chit: If it goes by boat it'll take longer.
Woman: Boat?
Chit: I'd pay the extra for airmail, if I was you.
Woman: First Class will do, thanks.
Chit: But it's going Abroad.
Woman: No, it's going to Yorkshire.
Chit: Isn't that Abroad?
Woman: No. It isn't.
Chit: It's in Ireland.
Woman: No, it really isn't.
Chit: You sure?
Woman: Yes. I'm sure.
Chit: It's in England?
Woman: Yes, it's in England.
Chit: Oh. That'll be £2.49, then.
Posts
Too close to The Truth. Twice, TWICE I have had this conversation at my post office.
ReplyDeleteMe: This one's going to Ireland.
Postclerk: Northern Ireland or Southern Ireland.
Me: Ireland, Ireland. Northern Ireland is UK. Ireland is another country.
Postclerk (sighs): So it's going to Southern Ireland?
Me: There's no such place.
Well, there isn't.
I just grateful it didn't say WEST Yorkshire on the parcel or they'd still be debating the merits of airmail.
ReplyDeleteIsn't that sexist or something-ist. I thought only grumpy old folk like my long-dead mother talked about chits of girls. It seems highly and intentionally offensive. What? Oh right then...
ReplyDeleteIt might be chittist, I suppose ...
ReplyDeleteAt least you had a conversation (of sorts) with the 'Chit'. The counter staff at our post office always look so miserable. To put it another way, when any of them suck a lemon, the lemon pulls a face!
ReplyDeleteThat's funny. Does anyone get training these days to do jobs like this?
ReplyDelete@ Martin - I shall form a campaign to reclaim (ooh, inadvertant rhyme!) the word CHIT. I would be OVERJOYED to be considered a mere CHIT of a girl, instead of that (and I quote) HULKING GREAT LUMP.
ReplyDelete@ Fran - yes, they all have A* in Geography and Public Relations. AND they know which way up to stick the stamp (so all the blood doesn't rush to Queen Brenda's head.)
I think the blood has definitely rushed to my head, after treating myself to reading a selection of your blog posts...keep up the good work!
ReplyDelete