Who's a pretty boy, then?

Since the new coalition government seized power, a sharp rise in parrot jokes has been recorded.

"It's odd," said Mimi Ditto, spokesperson for the Endangered Jokes Association (EJA), "and we can't quite put our finger on the exact cause, but jokes that haven't seen the light of day since Bernard Manning fell off his perch are making a comeback in a big way."

The EJA monitors and logs jokes told in comedy clubs, theatres, on television, radio and in print.

According to the EJA's records, this week alone has seen Barry Cryer dusting off an old joke about parrots and root vegetables on Radio 3; Andy Hamilton riffing about a lovebird in a brothel on Channel 4; Cristiano Ronaldo finally admitting he'd had a cockatoo; George Osborne denying any responsibility for an ailing budgie and Lembit Opik plugging his new comedy career in the Daily Mail by mentioning a singer in 'Wings' called Paul Macaw's knee feathering his nest with remixes."

"That last one wasn't funny - Lembit never is - but we logged it all the same," said Mimi. "We haven't seen such a flock of parrot jokes for many a year."

We asked the heads of the ConDem Alliance if they had a favourite joke to share with the members of Newsbiscuit.

"I was only joking when I said Mick was a big joke," said David Cameroon.

"He was only joking when he said I was a big joke," repeated Mick Clegg.