(For ease of reference, anyone intending to follow this regime, shall be referred to as a 'Slimmer'. In this context, Slimmer is a noun and not a comparative.)
1. The Slimmer should not place War and Peace, The Bros. Karamazov and Anna Karenina on the scales, balance atop them, note the displayed digits, remove said texts, weigh him/herself again and delight in his/her sudden diminution. This is known as a Russian Manoeuvre and is considered a foul.
2. Ditto (as above) using Martin Chuzzlewit, Barnaby Rudge and The Old Curiosity Shop - a.k.a The Dickensian Dodge.
3. If you (The Slimmer) wish to dawdle as you are listening to your book of choice, then you (The Slimmer) must accept that weight loss will be comparatively slower. Books that encourage dawdling include Poetry. Please note that it is difficult to walk at a brisk, effective pace whilst admiring hosts of golden daffodils. Admiring hosts of golden daffodils is to be discouraged whilst following this regime.
4. Running or jogging whilst listening to Great Works of Literature is unseemly. Eleanor Dashwood, Fanny Price, Catherine Morland et al did not jog anywhere. Neither should you.
5. If you eat 814 Cadbury's Creme Eggs whilst following this regime, you will not lose any weight at all.